The Dance of Romance

Romancers! This is my first time with all of you. (so to speak)

I mean, I’ve never done this before with anyone.

So please…be gentle.

That doesn’t mean I haven’t wanted to do it.

I really have. After-all, everyone else is doing it so why shouldn’t I?

I suppose my reasoning is because I haven’t found the right one yet.

That is…until today.  :)

Fellow Romancers, while my intro is tongue in cheek there is a seriousness behind it. I don’t do what I’m about to do lightly. Don’t get me wrong, I am a frontrunner of championing other authors, I’m just a bit gun-shy when it comes to singing their praises. I’ve tried it. Even had a page on this site which is now gone, titled: “Must-Read Blogs”. After promoting everyone else’s work and (barely) getting a thank you, I realized how narcissistic writers can be. MaryAnn Kempher is not one of those writers. She has been a friend, a fan (of even me), and a solid force in the up and coming world of published authors.

Because of all of the above, I am PROUD to share this space with MaryAnn, whose first Romantic Suspense Novel: Mocha, Moonlight, and Murder is now available on Amazon!

So…without further adieu, (clichéd but I want to get to this.  MaryAnn Kempher!

Let’s begin by you telling us a little about yourself.

Thank you for hosting me Handsome. I’m married with two great kids. I live near Tampa, Florida and I spent my teen years living in Reno NV where this story is set.

Tell me a little bit about Mocha, Moonlight, and Murder. Where did the idea for your story originate?

Mocha, Moonlight, and Murder is Romantic Suspense. I tell people if you like Jane Austen and/or Agatha Christie, you’ll love this book. It has romance, and mystery, suspense, and comedy. The romance is very realistic, very friendship-based, and doesn’t come easy. Katherine and Scott were made to harass each other. Because they start as friends, and aren’t trying to get each other into bed, they’re not afraid to give each other a hard time, this makes for some very funny dialogue. Also, the waiting (to sleep together) ensures great sexual tension for them, and the reader. It also gives their romance a solid foundation.

Well, let me say that I have read it and was hooked from beginning to end. What motivates you to write?

Well, what motivated me to finis Mocha, Moonlight, and Murder was my family. Mostly my daughter who just turned 13. She was so proud of me and my writing, I wanted to be a good role model for her; to show her that even when things don’t come easy you should finish what you start. I keep writing because it’s fun for me as well.

Have you been writing long?

I’ve always liked writing. I never minded the essays and term papers required in school. However, it wasn’t until 2008 that I sat down at the computer intent on writing a book.

Do you have a routine when you write? A method to your writing?

Yes and no. I try to get in front of the computer every week-day by about ten am, but I’m not as disciplined as I should be. Sometimes I spend more time tweeting, or checking Facebook or my email account than I do writing. Then other times, I sit down and the words just seem to flow. I’ll look down and realize I’ve written a thousand words. Those are the best days.

Do you have any other works in progress?

Yes. It’s not exactly a sequel, but a lot of the characters from my first book will be in this one too. Readers could read this book on its own, but will enjoy it more if they read my first book first. That way they’ll feel like they’re running into old friends in instead of just meeting them.

Can you give us a hint about the next book?

I’ll tell you it’s set on a cruise ship. Two people have been murdered and it’s up to the head of security to find out who before the ship reaches land. Honestly, I’m really excited about this book. I really think if you liked my first book, you’re going to love this one too.

Where can your book be purchased?

June 11-15, it’s available on Amazon.com. for FREE for Kindle users.

After those dates it will still be fairly inexpensive, at only $2.99 for Kindle users. It can also be purchase as a paperback at http://www.amazon.com/-/e/B00CDNQ37Q?tag=wp-amazon-associate-20

Thanks so very much, MaryAnn for your time and insight into your current as well as next project.

I understand you can also be reached at the following addresses:

Twitter: https://twitter.com/MaryAnnKempher

Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/AuthorMaryAnnKempher?filter=1

Goodreads: http://www.goodreads.com/author/dashboard

Pinterest: http://pinterest.com/maryannkempher/boards/

MaryAnn, I thank you so much for sharing your work with us. I truly enjoyed your book!

Before I officially begin this post, let me explain what has been going on in HH world. I am personally taking the time to revamp this site as well as working on my personal site: HandsomeHansel.com.  I have also become a regular contributor to RomanceUniversity.org which was recently named by Writer’s Digest as one of the top 100 websites for writers.

For those who have been salivating for the sixth installment of Quinn & Sabrina’s “The Night She Had Been Waiting For” *WIP*, I assure you I am heartily executing chapter after chapter in the hopes of having their complete story released via e-book within the next 60 days. Side note…when I hit 300 likes on my Dance Of Romance FaceBook page I will post Chapter 6! (I have had over 1500 requests for Chapter 6! Thank You Romancers!)

Not only Quinn & Sabrina, but I am also working on “I Will Love You For The Rest Of My Lie” as well as Davie’s story. Davie’s story is one with which I have no idea where it is going but I know I can’t wait to get there. He holds a special place in my heart and I can’t wait for him to find his Soul-Needle.

I chose a short while back to turn my life on its head and do what everyone told me I was meant to do and what I felt in my heart was calling me to do… become a full-fledged writer and published author. I had no idea how all-consuming that world was until I got here. So, to my 42,000 and rising Fans, Followers, and Friends out there who have been patient, understanding, and loyal…I say “Thank You” from the bottom of my soul. I promise to not disappoint.

Stay tuned, closely. Things are about to get VERY interesting. In the meantime, I have something I need to get off my chest so, here goes!

HH

@DanceOfRomance

@The_Real_HH

I am and always will be, a Romantic. I believe in the Happily-Ever-After. I believe in genuinely being over the moon with someone for decades on end. I also believe with the soul of my core, that in order for those things to happen there MUST be transparency in the relationship. It simply won’t work otherwise.

Lo and behold…my Sunday paper arrives and when I hit the “Life” section, there on the front page is an article devoted to a website that provides fake girlfriends for men. I read through the article and, quite frankly, couldn’t get my head wrapped around the concept.

In case you haven’t heard of it, let me catch you up to speed.

There is an online site (which shall remain nameless until I settle on a lawyer that doesn’t snort when I tell him what I do.) which, for $250 a month will rent you a fake girlfriend that you’ll never meet. This girlfriend will communicate with you across the social media platforms you choose as well as send you a few texts during the month and even leave voice-mail messages you can conveniently play over speaker phone for others to hear.

While the website gives a few instances with which this makes sense for the average dude, they admit that primarily it is used to make an ex jealous.

WHAT?!?!

I don’t know about you but I don’t keep in contact with exes. There is no need to. So I guess the idea of hiring a fake girlfriend to make an ex jealous is lost on me. Maybe it’s my age, maybe it’s my life experiences, perhaps it’s because I feel games of the heart played after the demise of a relationship never declare a winner. I have learned there is an upcoming generation that is all about themselves so maybe that is a part of it. Because I couldn’t quite get it, I read the article again… and then again.

It turns out that $250 per month was their “basic” package. I shudder to think what chaos could ensue with the purchase of upgrades but the article did mention that you never ever meet your fake girlfriend. They will set up a fake FaceBook page, Twitter account, etc and you can even change your relationship status to reflect that you are in a relationship with an apparition. I find it sad, really, to have to pay a website $250 a month to prove you’re a loser.

What have we as men become?

I understand the need to get some sort of emotional revenge after a bitter breakup, it’s human nature, but actually signing up to a website which provides a pseudo female companion in order to, what? Make your ex jealous?

As a meat-eating, whisky drinking, ‘As you wish’ replying man, let me paint a few scenarios for you as I see them:

1. He breaks up with her and feels the need to prove he’s moved on.

My take…he’s not over her and should have never broken up. Plus…he’s about 10 years old mentally and emotionally. (My apologies to all the 10 year old boys out there.)

2. They decide mutually that it isn’t working for them and it only makes sense to go their separate ways.

In this case the guy is the epitome of a narcissist with a heavy helping of ego. He’s just being a jackass and I am pretty sure 99.9% of women would see through it.

3. She breaks up with him.

At this point it’s obviously much deserved. And he knows it.

So, in a juvenile attempt to win her back, he “johns” himself to Madam Phantom. Hell, at $250 a month minimum to send 10 texts per month and communicate on FB, I’LL do it!

This is emotional, revengeful prostitution for the modern age.

I want to be there when the guy stutters with his answer when his friends and family asks when they can meet her.

I want to be there when he’s signing the invoice sent to him and applying payment, just so I can ask him: “What the hell are you thinking?!”

I want to be there when he gives excuse after excuse as to why she has never been seen by ANYBODY.

Don’t think less of me because I want to see the crash. After-all, I wasn’t the one driving in the wrong lane to begin with.  I just feel the need to experience it in the hopes of understanding. I am a writer after all. Therefore I am plagued with unsolicited thoughts I have to deal with on a constant basis.

Most men have become pussified. (Not a word I favor at all but one which works here.)

Women want a Man and men want a Woman. True to the core, accessible, transparent.

Why is it that games are played at all?

When I read the article, I could read between the lines and hear what wasn’t mentioned: Men are pathetic, men are to be made fun of, men are losers. Dammit guys! Stand up! If you don’t think for a second that your ex and her friends aren’t on to you then you deserve what’s coming to you.

Let’s take just a second and give the process the benefit of the doubt and assume it does work in making his ex jealous enough to want to come back to him.  For whatever reason, his ex can’t stand the idea of him moving on and begins texting/calling him in an effort to win him back. A few weeks go by and eventually she forces his hand by telling him to cut off all communication with the “other woman” so that they can move forward.  I guess I see him sending a text to his fake girlfriend that goes something like this:

“I hate to do this but we have to break up. I am getting back together with my ex but I wanted you to know that what we had was special and I’ll never forget you. Hang in there as I’m sure you will eventually find the one you were meant to be with as well.

Ps: Since the month isn’t completely up, can you prorate my last payment and refund the difference back? Thanks.”

Now what? He’s broken up with his fake girlfriend and gotten back with his ex. The deception worked! Good for him, right?

Wrong.

Now he has to answer the inevitable questions that will come from his ex: “How did you meet?”, “What was her name?”, “Is she pretty?”, etc, etc. And with each question he answers he’s digging himself a bigger hole. All he has really achieved is getting back into a relationship with even more lies and deceptions than before.

Of course there is always a chance that his ex will eventually find out that he hired a fake girlfriend. What then? Will she feel flattered he went to juvenile lengths to win her back or will she see him in a new light radiating pathetic beams?

Help me out ladies. Help me to understand what this looks like from a female perspective. Leave your comments below as I’m sure the men who visit here on occasion need to learn what a woman REALLY want when it comes to transparency and honesty in a relationship.

Fellow Romancers!  This comment was originally posted in my confessional. I would like your take on it.

lover of men says:

February 1, 2013 at 5:13 pm

There was a time in my life where I had multiple lovers. If I needed attention I had about 6 men on standby that would gladly oblige and pay me a visit. These men turned out to be great friends I would sometimes spend entire weekends with.

This all ended when I moved out of state. I grew a little lonely and didn’t have the desire to build such a “dance list” as I had before. I felt as if I was wasting away and maybe those men didn’t care all that much about me as a lover or a person. I wondered if they simply moved on to find a new playmate and forgot about me.

All that ended when, within the span of 1 week, 4 of those men sent me a text or an email telling me how much they missed me, how I was the best lover they ever had and no one would come close to my charm, personality or talent and wished I had never moved.

Romancers! This is a post from Fontana which was originally sent to my Confessional Page.  As I am revamping my site because of it’s growth in traffic, I have decided again to post it here and ask for your sincere help with Fontana’s dilemma. On some level we have all had a similar relationship such as hers. I think we’d both like to hear your advice as well as your stories.

Weaving Corks & Conversation,

Found your website today. Love what I’ve read so far.

This is liable to be long. Here’s me: educated, divorced (since 2002), active, friendly, helpful, and 50 yrs old. My children are in their 20s and I have a wonderful 2yr old granddaughter. Everyone, no exaggeration, thinks I look 10 yrs younger. My friends and family think the world of me and tell me I dress well and that I’m attractive. I want to find that special someone. Internet sites are out of the question. I’ve tried other dating services in person.

There’s a man I’ve known for 6 yrs who I’m completely stuck on. We started being friends about 4-5 years ago. We have the same employer (no problems dating there due to different jobs/departments). We can talk about anything to each other, we joke, flirt, talk serious and support each other. We even met at the gym and chatted lots while exercising, though sometimes more talk, less exercise. In 2010 both of us, three months apart, had major health issues. His was in April. I was devastated when I got the news. That’s when I knew how I felt deep in my heart. We spoke often on the phone and he was very glad for every call. We spent lots of time deep in conversation. I was relieved when he returned to work.

My daughter was pregnant at the time and things we rough between her & I. In mid-July I had a heart attack. I wouldn’t let friends put anything on social media until after I’d talked to him. Didn’t want him to find out that way. We talked on the phone and it was obvious that he was very concerned. He was at my house a few days later and while doing something for me in the kitchen said “I think the news of you being in the hospital hit me the same way my news hit you.” I heard him but, due to the side effects from rx meds, it didn’t sink in until much later.

Depending on our work schedules we usually have lunch together 2-4 times a week, he’s been to my house numerous times for parties and small dinners, we’ve attended some of the same events. He’s met my entire family thanks to various events including the big 5-0 party. He lets me use his vacation home any time I need to get away and helped with a special birthday excursion for my mom last year. In a candid conversation with a married female friend, she asked whether I’d gone out on dates lately. I told her I’d like to but that I didn’t think it was right, especially considering how I felt about this man. I explained more. Her jaw dropped and she said “oh my god, you’re in love with him”. Yeah, that hit the nail on the head.

He is single, straight, a few years younger, educated, and many of the attributes I look for in a man. A friend suggested that maybe this guy is a bit ‘shy’ about asking for the date. We chatted on the phone (March 2011) and I asked about maybe doing something together by ourselves. I told him that I didn’t know if he realized how much I cared for him. The conversation went well (he didn’t think I was nuts). I said that I didn’t know if he would feel awkward since we work at the same place, he said that it wouldn’t stop him when the time came. I know he wasn’t lying when he said that he valued and enjoyed what we had right now and didn’t want to lose it. I asked him to let me know if he ever changed his mind.

In the weeks after that, things were still the same between us. Even now we eat together fairly often and still discuss every thing under the sun, from our health and families, to his wonderful advice about some current things I’m working on. He even takes me to the eye doc (when they dilate your eyes and can’t drive after). He’ll sit in the office with me and chat, even making fun of me while I can’t see. I’ve mentioned to him many times that he’s one of my very closest friends.

I feel that maybe his thoughts are changing in a good direction. He does have a minor lingering issue with hearing in one ear. I wonder if his uncertainty about this is holding him back. He’s mentioned that if he can’t get it fixed he may have to retire from his job. I want to tell him that it has no effect on how I feel about him. Maybe then it will really sink in for him. I’d say yes in a minute if he were to pop THAT question. There’d be no doubt in my mind.

Any advice or thoughts?

Fontana